Giving flowers….now- A special birthday shout out!
A special birthday shoutout: Join me!
My mother was 21 and in her second year of college when she became pregnant with me. She did not plan to have me interrupt her college studies- as she was the first in her immediate family to attend college. But, there I was, born 3 months after she turned 22, on a day where interrupted something else she was engaged in…an episode of Soul Train. She tells me that when her water broke on Saturday, December 29th, while she was watching her beloved show, she waited until Soul Train was over to start making her way to the hospital to give birth to me. I often wonder if that’s what contributed to my love of dancing throughout my life.
After a few years of cobbling together infant and toddler care for me through some wonderful family members and neighbors who provided informal family childcare for me, my mom was able get a subsidy from BCS now known as ACS, when I was 3, so she started me in a preschool classroom at Cypress Hills Community Daycare.
At 3, I walked into a classroom of adults who were not related to me, and hadn’t met me before, and that is where I encountered Ms. Jelks, my first teacher. I don’t have many memories of Ms. Jelks at 3, but I do remember how I felt. I remembered feeling comfortable and loved.
Throughout my childhood and life, my mother spoke so highly of Ms. Jelks, I’ve always felt like she was a part of my family, even though I didn’t see her after I left preschool.
Looking back at this early care and education experience I had through my now adult (and expert) eyes, I’m struck by a few things:
My mom is a fierce protector of me, and anything that relates to me. She wasn’t going to let me spend all day with anyone or at any program that wasn’t going to treat me like the gift from God she knew I was.
So, for my mother to speak so highly of her young child’s first teacher the way my mom did, I know Ms. Jelks had to be an extremely caring and loving teacher to me.
My mother clearly felt that my daycare was an extension of her family, and that I was safe and well cared for. That’s exactly what every family (no matter their race, income, culture, or other background) should feel when they take their child to infant, preschool, and school at all ages.
I don’t remember much about preschool, but I will tell you what I know for sure: my lack of memories doesn’t mean that I didn’t learn anything in preschool. In fact, the opposite is true.
Right now, just about 5 decades after that preschool experience, beginning with Ms. Jelks, I:
have earned a Bachelor’s Degree with High Honors, and
three Masters degrees, all from Ivy League, and renowned institutions.
have been a preschool teacher (!), plus
an elementary school teacher, and
a teacher educator for college students, and
have been a director of content for Sesame Street® (seasons 38 and 39!), and
have been an executive director (twice),
have earned a parent leadership award for my service to NYC public schools
and am now a Black woman business owner and CEO who, 2 days ago, celebrated her 10th year of owning a business (!!).
Note: Only about 3% of Black women-owned companies survive over five years.
Everything I’ve done in school and work, all of the healthy communication and relating I try to do in my personal and professional life, all of the creativity I nurture daily, all of the play I try to engage in as an adult, all the ways I try to balance work and rest in my life….have their foundations in my preschool experience (and of course, my home and community experiences, too). So much of what I did and learned in preschool set me up for life!
Yes, even though I don’t remember the details. This is true for all of us, and for the young children in your life. This is why I am so committed to helping people, orgs and systems “get it right” for the youngest ones. This is the most important time in their lives- the foundation setting time.
A few years ago, I became friends with Ms. Jelks on a social media platform. It’s been so wonderful to see her with my adult eyes, living her fabulous retired life. And when we message, I just feel so…loved, just like I did at 3. She is so supportive of me, and so proud, and she tells me so. She should be. She poured herself into me, and set a powerful foundation for me, along with my mother, my family, and my community. I am proud to show her what the outcome of her care and education of a 3 year old looks like - 50 years later.
Today is Ms. Jelk’s 70th birthday. And she is truly living her best life, traveling the world with her friends and loved ones, and going to great parties when she’s home, according to her socials feed.
Please join me in wishing my very first teacher, from when I was 3; Ms. Jelks Happy Birthday!
Ms. Jelks: I wish you love, joy, happiness, and the peace in knowing that your life’s work has made, and continues to make a difference!
Who were the pivotal caregivers and teachers in your early childhood years?
Respond to this email with the teacher’s name, your first name (or initials), and tell us something about this teacher. We’ll share your words on our social media post over the coming days and weeks. Let’s give the caregivers and eduators of the youngest of children their flowers!
In community and connection,
Takiema